Streaming: Machete

When you read the title, you just can’t say it “muh-shet-ee”. Rather, “Mah-chet-eh”. Danny Trejo has a most distinguishable face and as a Mexican myself, I am glad to see him in particular, as the lead on the big screen.

If you’ve been keeping up with my reviews, you’ll know that I absolutely love these kinds of flicks. The outrageous stunts and  blatantly fake gore make the movie not only hilarious but thoroughly enjoyable. I have to admit I liked Machete Kills better. It had more “Machete don’t…” phrases in it plus a little more blatantly fake gore. Michelle Rodriguez of Fast & Furious fame got the short end of the stick though. I liked her character much more than the one Machete ended up with. She was a stick in the mud!

Danny Trejo is not much of an actor but he sure stays busy, right? You’ve seen him at one point or another whether it’s some action flick or a candy bar commercial. He’s definitely doing something right.

Check out his bio, it’s worth a look:

http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001803/bio?ref_=nm_ov_bio_sm

I give this movie four stars for fun and Cheech Marin. ****

Streaming: The Words

As a writer, I could relate to this movie quite a bit. Not that I’ve found a fantastic manuscript to steal, but that I know how hard it is to become a better writer. It can be really frustrating at times and the rejection is worse than unrequited love.

That being said, this was an interesting film. Bradley Cooper didn’t really have to do anything special, but his humiliation was real. Jeremy Irons is always a favorite as well. Zoe Saldana has also become a favorite of mine ever since Star Trek.

I was glad to see Dennis Quaid in a movie although he didn’t have to try hard, either.

Rather, this movie had a lot of meat. I enjoyed the angst of each of the characters; how each one suffered their own pain and deeply. I loved the way the story delicately intertwined each of them without making their stories too separate.

Well written, good performances and a good story. Four stars. ****

Mad Max: Fury Road

I don’t remember the old Mad Max movies, I was too young to see them at the time. I was old enough to see Thunderdome but being a good Catholic girl prevented me from sneaking in.

Fury Road had just enough: just enough dialogue to create a plot and establish characters, just enough love interest to create interest without making it mushy, and all the rest action and violence: just enough.

The costumes were creative and resourceful, but I was a little disappointed with the vehicles. I remember being very impressed with the shock value of the vehicles back then, so strange and…carnal. This time around they were good, but I felt they could have been better, more creative and violent-looking. They were too tame.

That being said, the stunts were not necessarily impressive, but cool enough to add flavor without going over the top. The men on poles and the motorcyclists dropping grenades were among my favorites.

The best part, however, was the villain’s “band”. Seeing the clump of vehicles along the horizon, the heat shimmering and the dust clouds rising around them with an electric guitar grinding in the background gave the villains a deeper level of badness. It was awesome.

Having so little dialogue means no acting necessary. Anybody could’ve done this movie, but I’m glad Charlize Theron was in it. Tom Hardy didn’t do so bad, either. I’d like to see more of him to get a better feel for what he is capable of.

Nicholas Hault. Nux. Unfortunately for him (or me), his makeup was so similar to that in Warm Bodies, I couldn’t help but think of him as a cute little zombie teen. Oh well.

Although I was a little bored during some of the action scenes, the different components made it worthwhile.

Three and a half stars. *** */**

Streaming: In Dreams

Annette Bening! Wow! Whatever happened to her, anyway?

What an interesting movie. I thought it odd, however, that after having these dreams all of her life she’s only now discovering them to be premonitions?? Oh well.

The movie seemed to drag here and there, but for the most part, it kept a good pace. I was anxiously awaiting Robert Downey, Jr. to whoosh in as some psychic who could interpret dreams but alas, he was the villain: a little underdeveloped, but a good one just the same.

The ending was still up in the air until the husband dies, then you know Annette has nothing left to live for and her death is imminent. What happened after her death was fantastic. I was pleasantly surprised by the ending. It reminded me of an episode of The Twilight Zone (newer ones) where murderers are put in a dream state and they are fed nightmares over and over. Nice.

I liked the show, it was fun to see a teenagery RDJ and it was nice to be reminded what a great actor Annette Bening is.

Three and a half stars. *** */**

P.S. Looks like we will see Annette in 2016. Can’t wait!

Streaming: Horns

This was a fascinating story about a man whose girlfriend is murdered and he gets the blame. Growing giant ram horns on his head doesn’t help. They are beautiful and realistic horns, by the way.

Daniel Radcliffe does a great job being a regular guy in odd circumstances. (wait a minute…) It’s a great whodunnit that’ll keep you guessing until the end. The horns had the power to compel anyone in Radcliffe’s presence to divulge their deepest secrets-confess, if you will. Not to mention a fantastic plot twist.

Intriguing and captivating, this is a great movie for a rainy day. Another original story! Hooray!

Four stars. ****

Streaming: Perfume: The Story of a Murderer

This was a strange yet slightly captivating story about a boy with an extraordinary sense of smell. He gets older and finds himself trying to duplicate the scent of a woman. What an interesting subject!

I could have easily abandoned this film early on. It was so boring and uninteresting for a good chunk but I was so intrigued by the subject matter that I just had to see it to the end. I was not disappointed.

I was surprised to see Dustin Hoffman in the film, though, and he played his wonderful Mr. Magorium of Perfumes self. He was delightful. Alan Rickman played the worrisome father as all the young women of the town start disappearing. No Snape here.

Being a period piece, the sets and costumes were remarkable. Everyone was sufficiently dirty and shoeless. Or toothless.

Our main character’s final breakthrough was enough to gross me out and the outcome was also remarkable.

I’m giving it four stars for its unique story line. Four stars. ****

Streaming: The Taking of Deborah Logan

If you don’t like found-footage films, don’t bother. It’s not my favorite style, but I had been interested in this movie for awhile. This was sufficiently spooky and creepy. Special effects were believable and gross. Jill Larson, who plays Deborah Logan, was incredible. Usually in a horror flick you expect the old people to either be creepy or good actors. Jill Larson was both and then some. I was pleasantly surprised.

The story line was believable and even the characters were too. Again, usually I expect less in a found-footage film. This is really a movie to get into. A few jump-scares, tension, excitement, the whole bit-it all was very well played. It was a good story, the actors did very well, and it was scary, creepy, gross and even stomach-turning. I loved it!

Take some time to see it on a night when you’re all alone and it’s a dark stormy night.

Four stars. ****

Avengers: Age of Ultron

We have all been waiting with bated breath for Ultron to come out and here we are, done waiting. I enjoyed the movie although it seemed more like a soap opera than a movie. Everyone had their own story line going, from budding romance to other-worldly soul searching. James Spader is a favorite of mine and I was hoping to actually see more of him but alas, we were only blessed by his voice and gestures thanks to motion capture.

I was very excited to see the face of Jarvis, Mr. Paul Bettany. How fun! I don’t know anything at all about Vision, but I loved his cape. It flowed like silk.

Great action, fun jokes for the kids, romance, good v. evil, sorrow, and Hawkeye finally getting some screen time being a hero. Good job, Jeremy Renner! No more Sugar Sickness for you!!!

The whole “let’s be a team” theme didn’t really show itself very clearly. We did see pairs of Avengers collaborating to defeat the robot soldiers, but the only team effort seemed to be that they all agreed that this was most likely a suicide mission. Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch were interesting and worked well in the story. I was sad that after all that talk of teamwork, all the heavy hitters split. I understand wanting to start a family or rule Asgard, (I almost said Isengaard. Sheesh. One might think I watch too many movies.) but still, it made me rather melancholy.

Four stars. ****

Streaming: Dhoom:3

If you haven’t seen a Bollywood movie yet and you like action films, this is a good one. I’ve had the Indian Terminator in the wings ever since I saw a clip on youtube.

Back to Dhoom: 3. This is the third installment of a Mission: Impossible-meets-Die Hard Bollywood flick. I don’t know any of the actors, never seen ’em before, Aamir Khan, the gentleman who played the villian was fantastic. Talented in action, dance and singing, this guy is a wonder.

The movie itself is a wonder in all the ridiculous stunts, the “Neo Backbend” playing part in almost every fight scene, acceptable CG, the funny sidekick, and the terrible acting by the lead character. There was more time spent on the villain than the lead character, Jai Dixit. Jai reminds me of Keanu Reeves. Same face, same voice in the movie throughout.

I remember seeing “Monsoon Bride” ages ago, and getting frustrated with my friend that recommended it for not telling me it was a musical. I don’t do musicals. But now I’m beginning to wonder if this is just the Bollywood style: filled with dance and song even during the credits. I don’t know and I don’t plan on finding out anytime soon. I found it interesting how they intermixed Hindi and English-I wasn’t expecting that. My family does that with Spanish and English, so I was somewhat used to it. Kinda cool.

Back to the review: Hilarious although I doubt it was meant to be. Having taken place in Chicago it was very interesting to see how Americans are depicted. (The Americans were pretty bad actors too.) The stunts were fun although there’s only so much you can do with a motorcycle before it gets old.

Favorite line: “My brain is like a raisin, Jai: small and sweet.”

I laughed throughout and was impressed that the movie continued until the end of the credits. Once again, kudos to Aamir Khan for his performance. Impressive!

My vote: four stars. ****